Who am I becoming? — Stephanie McAlister

Stephanie

Thursday, November 28 2012
YIP. Orland Bishop’s week..

Where shall I begin.. who am I becoming?
What of this have I shared with you?
Have you wanted to see it?
Why have I kept some away?
Where have you gone, your thoughts…
I want an understanding of how creation manifests.
Is that not interesting to you? Ways of doing and knowing and being.
How can I show you myself then.
What initiates the change of how I act now.

A seeker of knowledge must first experience perception.
If you seek to know me, how do you perceive me?
Do I hold your attention? What parts of this do you examine? Investigate..

When I reflect on our experiences I have a reference point. A place where my knowledge of what is can be directed. Is it reflected?

I know knowledge is never finished because it must become something else. In this we must act out of intelligence and understanding. And know what it is we need in order to receive it.

As I bear witness to my perception, I behold the world. Reaching you as insight.
In thought,
more illuminating than light.

And since the word is what allows us to share meaning, I should give my words to you.
And have you witness my perception. Creation of the word in verse.

I am aware of this experience I have in the world.
Giving intention, attention. But what do I do with this power?

Can I change the conversation to recover meaning?
Is there a way to really know what something is?
Or who someone is?

Is it not our duty to question everything? I think perhaps you know this.

I am the end result of my thinking. Individually responsible for myself. And only when I can be myself, can I be more with others.

But can you be more aware of the speaker and not the speech?
What if the process I use for understanding is what can be used to understand me?

Then how can I be where you are?
That we can reach there together
and reach the next act.
Or do you want to?

If we arrive at a place where meaning is..
Intuitive certainty, a direct revelation of the truth occurs. And on some level of intuition we are prepared then,
for what comes.

In the act of seeing with intention, I must participate in your intention. My feeling comes into my presence of mind and I know you in a way.
And I can see something before it flows back into consciousness.

When I recover and re create you in me
I can see you in me
And in order to know you, I have to love you.

But knowing comes only through transcendent space, in the participation of trust in order to share.
I am open to first seeing you as you perceive yourself.
Trusting that who I am seeing is coming to me.
And the heart then creates knowing.

I ask you to take me where you are.
And give me your word.
Knowing we don’t give ourselves unless it is trustful and holds meaning.
I ask whether it does.

Knowing the mind and heart will tell when it is not safe.
And at a certain point find a boundary to protect from harm.

After you gave me your word, I gave you mine.
I did give you my words..
I gave you my
I gave you
I gave
I..

I give you my word makes you aware of the power of commitment.
Intention of agreement. Promise in the will.

If speech wants to arrive at a shared understanding between two human beings and I am my word.. a confirmation of who I know myself to be,
How do I do something to begin a conversation?
To go through speech and create something beyond ourselves.
A shared reality.

If the longing for wholeness is what takes us onward.. It is wisdom that makes us go where we are afraid to go,
As I go now.
And knowledge will follow.

Question also what kind of knowledge you are willing to embrace to be yourself.
Then be sure that once you take a step in that direction, it will come toward you.

Who carries what in what for each other then?
Perhaps the life I don’t have in me, you have in you.
And we exchange belonging.

And ask
Why did you leave where you left to come here?
What part of yourself were you seeking?
What part of me?

What celebration did you expect in that?
If something has meaning then it has reason
And we must earn knowing it.

Stephanie McAlister